
The Fear Document – Yourself (Part 2)
Do you fear yourself? And by yourself I mean who you are now as well as your better self if you’re trying to improve your life, as well as your business identity.
Becoming someone better means giving up who you are now. Maybe not totally, but at least a part of you.
Because you will need to invest some of your time, emotions, and actions in your new you.
That doesn’t mean it’s going to change you to the point you can’t recognize who you are. That simply means new things are going to happen and you will have some focus shift as well as new relationships, new projects.
As little as these changes can be they are still life changing because they update your behavior.
So maybe you fear this version 2.0 of you or your business, or its consequences. Doing better work, being a better person, helping more people implies that you have to show up more.
And, if you read part 1 on fear and procrastination, the unknown is a threat potential preventing yourself from taking action (showing up in this case).
Plus it seems there are so many things you want to do you may feel overwhelmed by the endless opportunities of the web. And that would mean even more exposure! And you’re not ready.
Please don’t give up that excitement. Nobody is ready.
Sure you can’t do everything at the same time, and no one asks you to. Don’t add too much pressure on your shoulders and always go SIMPLE.
However time will allow you to do various things. BUT you must commit to achieve, to finish, to deliver. You can reach multiple dreams, but you need to get some structure or planning, and of course execution to get there.
So here is how this second part on FEAR was going on in my head.
Fear of being useless, fear your message is worthless because it’s already been said by someone else. And said better.
Fear of being a marketer. Or fear of sounding salesy. Well with any kind of activity online, selling or marketing is going to play a role, especially if YOU want to play a role in your market. And playing a role doesn’t necessary mean becoming world famous. I surely don’t want to.
That doesn’t mean either you have to SELL, SELL, SELL. You will, sure.
To tackle this fear, you need to be a simple person (yet extraordinary). Don’t freak out, you will be extraordinary without even doing anything spectacular. That’s the beauty of simplicity.
That means being upfront and be meaningful to the right persons. People who value what you have for them will read your blog, join your list, pay for your consulting service.
People who are not ready, don’t have time, or simply don’t trust you at this moment are not your audience now. And that’s okay.
And admit that you don’t know everything. Nobody does. If someone comes to you and need an answer you don’t have, don’t try to explain a nonsense (mmm i like that wording).
Be upfront in not knowing enough (yet) or not having the right resource at hand, and meaningful by offering to find a solution together, if they want to.
Another reason for not putting your message out there is that it instantly transforms you into a marketer. And you start thinking that people who read it will immediately spot a marketer, or seller, and you’re here for the money.
Not to help as you say. Even if you just shared a blog post of yours and not the sales page of your product or service.
Well if this fear of objections is one of yours, great! Just have some objections busters ready then. If you were genuinely offering help then reinforce that and you never asked anyone to buy your stuff, just to read a blog post.
You just happen to have an opinion and wanted to share, just to help one person. And if you already have something to sell, well this is an amazing job to help people. It requires your time, attention, knowledge.
Helping is what you do for a living. You have to put food in your mouth to survive. And the consulting services, coaching program, video training, or simple report you’re selling is one way for you to buy food. It’s how you get paid.
It’s how they can get their problem solved faster or access to you directly, because you can’t help everyone at the same time. If you understand that, your audience should too, right?
Again being upfront helps:
“yes I have something to sell, it shows you how to [fix your damn problem]. This is how I do it. Will it work for you? I don’t know. We don’t know each other and I understand you don’t trust me. Therefore, don’t buy from me. I value your skepticism and get you may see my product as a new shiny object.”
(I may even want to add, “just as you will have a new shiny object to sell someday too, if you’re in this business” but is it necessary?)
Two things happen here.
First you show you are honest by not avoiding their concern. You’re not after a quick sale and you spell out exactly what the problem is: they don’t trust you.
Second thing is filtering out people who you don’t want to work with/interact anyway. Those who buy instantly new shiny objects and then ask for a refund because they’re not willing to do the work. Or just like to collect digital dust on their hard drive. You don’t want these as customers or subscribers. They won’t do you good and maybe even harm because they didn’t have the results they wanted (indeed, they didn’t take action on your material but… not their fault!).
At this point no transaction has been made, but the one who offered help immediately gets bashed, and thank you Mr reputation, this way please. The other one must be happy that he was the one revealing the plot.
Now, sure the coaching service offered on his website may have been the goal from the start but… who knows if he wasn’t just there to really help? He DID NOT mention he had a website or told anyone to check his profile. Get involved a little bit in a group of like minded people. Gain some trust in the process, and maybe later a client.
Isn’t that what we’re told to? If you don’t have anything to sell (or promote), how do you make a living online?
So to me that doesn’t justify getting bashed. The guy just did what every mentor told him to do.
Genuinely offer your help. Practice good karma in your market place. Show up. Have a Minimum Viable Product. Go meet your audience and make connections.
And that’s why you have to know how to overcome objections when you genuinely want to serve people and not sell them. Be upfront (honest) and meaningful (add value).
If you know these principles and live by these, want to apply these to help, then reinforce them to anyone when needed. If you add real value to people and believe in your product or service, there’s no reason to let anyone bash your offer or yourself and with it, reputation.
Especially if they don’t even know what you can do for them. I guess I should add it’s always better to stay polite, calm and courteous… mm?
Being upfront is not just being honest. It’s also stating what you’re doing and reformulate what concerns others are having about you and your products. Understand they don’t trust you from the start if it’s your first encounter with them.
Remember redefining yourself in simple, mundane and broader ways: just a random guy/gal who [does his/her thing.
However, if they flame you for no reason, be upfront by reinforcing what you’re doing and the principles you live by and that you apply those to your business. And maybe ask what they want, or expect to see from you.
It helps you you some insights on your audience, understand more of their concerns. All elements that can be used in copywriting to sell them more stuff! MWHAHAHAHAHA that evil plan 😉
And that’s how you kick fear in the nuts.
I don’t know if there will be a part 3. Again this was my fear document. How fear affects me and how I react to it (or how I think I should react to it). Writing about it helps me putting it away. So I wrote for you, and for me.
Have you started documenting your processes, or your feelings and see what new ideas, thoughts and solutions are coming up naturally?
Let me hear your comments. Let me read your thoughts. I just published mine!
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